Tuesday, August 20, 2019

swim with the tide

reading...  sort of reading Where'd You Go Bernadette

watching...  a documentary show about wildlife in Australia and also  "Outlander"

trying...  to get organized.  I've been purging my closet, organizing the pantry, sorting through paperwork.  It seems that once I get some headway in one thing, 5 more tasks pop up.  But I'm really motivated so hopefully I gain some ground.

baking...  I made the best pear/zucchini bread.  I tweaked the recipe by substituting some of the oil with a banana and also using a 1:3 ratio of coconut flour and white flour.  It came together perfectly.

eating...  tonight we are having baked chicken and wild rice and some sort of vegetable.  We are at the point in life where I have to be careful the amount of food I make because sometimes it is just the 2 of us.

drinking...  all the tea, hot and usually unsweetened unless I'm feeling froggy

doing...  today I taught a yoga class of 1 student, ran errands all over town, grocery shopped, and took my Charlie pup to the park and the beach (he is currently comatose in his bed)

going...  tomorrow I'm going to my favorite woods.  It's supposed to rain so it ought to be awesome!

loving...  being HOME.   Spending a month in a foreign country made me realize without a doubt that I love my life here at home.  I love driving my truck around with the music up too loud and the windows down and my dog in my lap, usually heading to the woods or the beach.  I love my little house and my little family and my 3 old hens that aren't laying eggs currently

dreading...  in one month my youngest son is packing up to head to college.  Ugh.  That's a kick in the gut.

enjoying...  painting my nails.  As a longtime nail-biter I rarely have nice nails but I've let them grow for three months and they look pretty dang good.  Today's polish is called "ravishing gown"...it's an iridescent purple.  

thinking...  yesterday I came across some of my private journal entries from 2 years ago.  I was in such a stuck place and it made me sad for that time where I felt helpless, unable or afraid to change. And I'm thankful for the transformational journey I've had since then and the freedom I've found.

feeling...  hopeful for autumn, a new season that will bring some sure changes but also great opportunities

hoping for...  my mom to have a successful surgery on her broken wrist.  Success and quick recovery.

listening to...  at this very moment Calvin Arsenia is singing "Back To You"

smelling...  lavender, lemon, and ylang ylang

thankful...  I'm thankful that I'll be adding a couple more yoga classes to my weekly schedule next month

considering...  the release of expectation.  Placing expectations on anything is a way we try to hold control, control we were never meant to have.  Release expectations and allow things to be as they are.  Save your strength to swim with the tide rather than fight against the current.

thoughts on Indonesia

Did you like Indonesia? 

I've heard this question many times in the two weeks since returning and I'm never sure exactly how to answer it.  Truth be told, I liked aspects of it, such as: the people (they are kind and funny and welcoming and gracious), the impeccable service, the lack of road rage during insane traffic, the diversity, and the coffee so good that I am forever ruined.

Things I did not like: pollution (worst in the world), the language barrier, Dengue fever, heat, traffic

My world was expanded with this trip as I was immersed in another culture for a solid month, where before I possessed some narrow-mindedness concerning other groups of people with lifestyles and mindsets different than my own.  Gosh, I've lived so small for so long in so many areas of my life.

Being a citizen of the US, born and raised on this soil without setting foot outside it's borders, I could never understand that the world outside of this country is capable and educated and strong and loving.  Without realizing it, I had a very conceited world view, that being that the US is the greatest country in the world and that means we are the best in every thing we do and no other country or people could ever be equal to or better than us.  Sheesh, so arrogant!  I didn't know I was living with that mindset until I visited southeast Asia and had those beliefs knocked right out of my head.

What I learned is that human beings are human beings the world over.  No matter the location or the style of clothing, the language, the social idiosyncrasies, the food culture, or the traditions.  We all want to live a happy life full of love and family, to eat good food and do something with our time that is fulfilling.  This is a world truth.  The US does not have the monopoly on happiness, no matter what I always believed.

Back to those things I liked about Indonesia...

The people.  I met some really great human beings and was so sad to leave them.  They made me feel welcome in a place so foreign.

The impeccable service.  Customer service is top notch in this country.  Friendliness, helpfulness, attention, respect.  I find that in the US I often feel as if I'm a nuisance to service industry staff but that was never the case in Indonesia.

The lack of road rage.  Imagine chaos.  Imagine movement everywhere.  Imagine congestion.  Imagine very loose road rules.  Then plop a car in the middle and get from point A to point B without getting angry or impatient or rude.  I witnessed this calm in the storm every single day as we had drivers everywhere we went.

The diversity.  I mentioned this already but it bears repeating.  The world is a big, beautiful, colorful canvas and I'm so thankful I got to witness it with a fresh perspective.

The coffee.  Every coffee I had in Indonesia was smooth and strong.  Crafted slowly and carefully.  Presented with pride.  Since I've been back home I've switched to tea.  My taste buds are true coffee snobs now.

And a few words about the things I did not like about Indonesia...

The pollution.  Ranked worst in the world, Jakarta rarely glimpses a blue sky.  The air is constantly hazy and thick with unhealthy particulates.  Add to that a serious litter and trash problem in most parts of the city.  I was surprised that Bali, an island retreat and vacation destination also had a terrible trash issue.

The language barrier.  I didn't realize this would be as big of an issue as it was.  I often felt very alienated in groups of people or in public places.  I was at a complete loss to communicate.  Thankfully there are many Indonesians that do speak English and would sometimes take pity on me and translate mid conversation.

Dengue fever.  This wasn't even on my radar but 12 days into my trip I began presenting symptoms of this disease that is spread through the bite of infectious mosquitoes.  There is no medicine for it, no immunizations, no cure.  I ended up in the hospital where I received IV fluids and blood tests to monitor my platelets.  Dengue fever knocked me completely down for a full week and a few days more of weakness.  But my victory song is that 2 weeks after my first symptoms I was climbing up the side of a volcano to view the sunset.

Heat.  Jakarta was hot and sticky.  Bali was not so bad.  But it sure made me miss my mild PNW weather.

Traffic.  Again, experiencing traffic in Asia made me long for my sleepy little island in Washington.  We spent a lot of time just getting from here to there.  So much car sitting.  So many times I just closed my eyes and mindfully relaxed my tensed up muscles.

Forever I will hold this trip close to my heart.  It was nothing like I'd expected, not like I'd planned but I firmly believe things happen on purpose to grow us or to expand us or to change us in some way.  I'm thankful for all of it.  The positive and the negative.  Not the Dengue though.  I'm really not thankful for that.